Nobody Does It Better than the Fighting Saints



Once again I want to congratulate Archbishop Jackels & Bishops Malloy, Nickless & Morlino on the excellent job they did this year. I am sure God will be adding a few jewels to your crowns when you get to Heaven for what you did to make us successful.

Now I have a big surprise for my team. I just heard from a reliable source that Carly Simon is doing a remake of her hit “Nobody Does It Better” from “The Spy Who Love Me” to honor them. She is rewriting some of the lyrics. Part of it will now go “Nobody does it better. Makes me feel sad for the rest. Nobody Does it better. Fighting Saints you’re the best.” I am sure it will be a number one hit when it does come out.

Since it isn’t out yet, here is Carly Simon singing the original version:


Dubuque Fighting Saints (v Croziers)

Updated @ 9:51 am CDT Tuesday because I found 1 more appearance of Archbishop Jackels last week

2nd update @ 11:20 am CDT

Well, this is it, the championship match. & I am very proud of the performance of the 3 Bishops who played this week, Archbishop Jackels & Bishops Malloy & Nickless.  They put their hearts & souls into it. I couldn’t have asked for more of them than they did.

Total points – 39

Archbishop Jackels – 14 points

20 Aug – New Melleray Abbey, Peosta, Ordained Brother Ephram to the priesthood – 3 points

21 Aug – DBQ Co Right to Life Protest Planned Parenthood participants appreciation luncheon, St Raphael Cathedral – 3 points

21 Aug – Letter to the editor,Telegraph Herald – 1 point

22 Aug – School Mass – Seton Catholic School, St Joseph Catholic Church, Farley – 3 points

24 Aug – Statement on Immigration issue published  in Telegraph Herald – 1 point

25 Aug – Mass @ Our Lady of the Mississippi Abbey & meeting with nuns – 3 points

(Note to link to articles so you can read them you have to be a subscriber of the online edition of the TH)

Bishop Malloy – 12 points

5 Top o the Morning videos – 5 points

20 Aug – Catholic Forum, WROK – 3 points

22 Aug – Observer column – 1 point

24 Aug – Hope for Haitians Dinner, Rockford, IL – 3 points

Bishop Nickless – 13 points

22 Aug – Cohort II Graduation Ceremony, Irene SD – 3 points

23 Aug – Newly assigned priests meeting – 3 points

24 Aug – Bishop’s Circle Mass, St. Joseph Church, Sioux City IA – 3 points

25 Aug – Year of Faith Holy Hour, Cathedral of the Epiphany, Sioux City IA – 3 points

22 Aug – The Shepherd Writes column – 1 point

Meanwhile, I am happy to report that, despite LarryD’s release of the fact that I was in negotiations with the residents of Saturn’s moon Titan before they were supposed to go public, they have been successfully completed. Effective immediately anyone who looks at Titan will see the following hologram on the top of the moon’s cloud layer:


Additionally, we are currently investigating the source of the leak. We hope to find out how LarryD got ahold of information about the secret negotiations since no one in my organization knew about them. Saturn Girl, of the Legion of Super Heroes has been contacted by her fellow Titanians & will soon be visiting LarryD to question him. & I would remind Larry that Titanians have telepathic powers, so he won’t be able to hide anything from her.


Another Cool Cat Comes Out for the Fighting Saints

As the Fighting Saints prepare to take on the Croziers for the championship, I am happy to announce that another cool cat has come out in support of the Fighting Saints.

Garfield has even posed for a poster.




However, all is not well at the Arbuckle residence. It turns out Odie is a Croziers fan:




Naturally Garfield has dealt with this in the only way possible:



A sign of the outcome for the championship I hope.



Western Division Championship (v Hierarchs)

I’m playing Bishops Malloy, Morlino & NIckless.

Total points – 17

Bishop Malloy – 11 points

12 August – WROK radio program – 3 points

15 August – Installation  Mass for Fr. Parker as Pastor @ St. Mary’s, Batavia – 3 points

5 Top o the Morning videos – 5 points

Bishop Morlino – 6 points

15 August _ Mass for Bishop O’Connor Pastoral Center (not that it earns any extra points, but it was in the Extraordinary form) – 3 points

2 Facebook posts – 2 points

15 August – Bishop’s column – 1 point

Bishop Nickless – 0 points As Fighting Saints fever continues to grow across the solar system, I am happy to announce that Grumpy Cat has signed on as our official spokescat.

Here is his 1st poster supporting the team:


What a lot of people may not be aware of is that Grumpy Cat (aka Tardar Sauce) has a brother named Pokey. He has agreed to help his brother promote the Fighting Saints.


It is a good feeling to have 2 of the coolest cats out there supporting the Fighting Saints.



As We Head Into the Playoffs “Fighting Saints” Fever Grows

After a week’s rest my team is ready & raring to go.

Meanwhile, I can say that I now have proof that not only that my fans are out of this world, but that there is intelligent life on Mars.

As you may know, the Curiosity Rover on Mars is now heading toward Mount Sharp. While on route, it recently took this picture of the “Twin Cairns”:


Here is a close up of the cairn.


Imagine the surprize at finding a Dubuque Fighting Saints logo on the side of the right cairn. Obviously there must be intelligent life on Mars for that to have been placed there. The fact that they are cheering on the Saints is obviously evidence that they highly intelligent as well.

Dubuque Fighting Saints Week 13 ( V Zealous Zuchettos)

Well, here we are at the end of the regular season. For the last match-up I played Archbishop Jackels, Bishop Malloy & Bishop Nickless. Bishop Malloy was off.

The team put in a good effort for the final week.

Total points – 22

Archbishop Jackels – 3 points

1 August 2013 – Sisters of the Presentation of the Blessed Virgin Mary, Address the sisters & meet & greet – 3 points

Bishop Nickless – 2 points

29 July 2013 – Statement Publicly correcting Congressman Steve King for some of his statements on immigrants that counter Church teaching (including facebook post)

1 additional Facebook post – 1 point

Bishop Malloy – 17 points 



29 July 2013 – WROK radio sprogram – 3 points

31 July 2013 – Diocesan Vocation Retreat, Main celebrant of retreat Mass, Bishop Lane retreat Center – 3 points

3 August 2013 – Main celebrant for Escuela de Formacion Mass, Carpentersville, IL – 3 points

3 August 2013 – Mass of Thanksgiving honoring James Cardinal Harvey, Cathederal of St. John the Evangelist, Millwaukee, WI – 3 points

5 Top o the Morning videos – 5 points


As I promised last week, I have gotten photographic evidence that Fighting Saints fever is spreading throughout the Railroad industry. Here it is.

This is a picture of a CSX locomotive. CSX operates in the Northern half of the Eastern part of the USA as well as Mexico.  Here we have one of their locomotives rolling down the rails showing their support of my team.


The other Class I railroad that operates in the Eastarn part of the USA is Norfolk Southern. Here is a shot of one of their locomotives with the Fighting Saints logo:


Next up we have one of my fans who has boldly gone where no fan has gone before, the International Space Station. As most people know, my paisan Luca Parmintano is from Italy. Recently on a spacewalk, he had some problems with water getting into his helmet.  The pictures just showed him from the side or back. So people didn’t get to see the front of the suit. Here is a shot of him taken in the suit, sans helmet, before heading out to space. Yes, there among the other patches on it is one with the Fighting Saints.


Speaking of space, I am sure most people are aware that Kate Mulgrew played Captain Kathryn Janeway on Star Trek: Voyager. People may also remember her start in 1975 on the soap opera Ryan’s Hope as Mary Ryan. A few may even remember that she played St. Elizabeth Ann Seaton in a TV biopic. But most people are not aware that Kate Mulgrew was born & raised in Dubuque, IA. So she naturally supports her hometown team. Here is a publicity shot from last May. & yes, there is the Fighting Saints logo on her top.


Finally, as Doctor Who fans know, the BBC announced the actor who will play the 12th incarnation of the Doctor, Pter Capaldi, another of my paisans. As you can see from this publicity photo releases by the BBC, he is also a Fighting Saints fan. (Note: Yes I know his mother is Scottish, but his father’s family came Picinisco in Italia.  As Mother Angelica once so rightly said “There is no such thing as a half Italian!“.)


So, as you can see, Fighting Saints fans are found not only internationally but throughout time & space.


As the Season Winds Down

With just this week to go, it looks like the Hierarchs have the Western Conference clinched. So I want to offer my congratulations on your win.

The Western Conference definitely was the more difficult one.


Still, I am proud of how my guys played. At this point they have the highest score. That tells me they gave it their best effort & the vagaries of a specific match-up. I couldn’t have asked any more from them (except maybe from Bishop Morlino when it comes to the Sinsinawa Dominicans & excommunicating a few of them).

I recently found out who 1 of  my biggest fans is. I received a fan letter from him earlier this week with the following picture enclosed.


It was postmarked from Vatican City & written a couple weeks ago. His cat is also a fan. The picture was taken after he added his paw print & was cleaning the soy based ink off of it. Papa emeritus Benedetto did drop a few hints about where Papa Francesco’s loyalties lie. He said that he knew I would understand why Papa Francesco had to publicly remain neutral.

Of course he ended the letter with a papal emeritus blessing followed by his signature. It went:

Benedictus etc.